Random Topic- Do you exist to me?

Random topic…

I have noticed in myself that I handle anger and lack of respect in two different fashions.

Let’s talk-

When I am angry with a person, I can still talk to them. I can still look them in the eyes and handle my day to day life where they are concerned. I clearly am not nice and do not go out of my way to make life easy for them. But, if they were on fire I would help put it out.

Now, if on the other hand,  I have lost respect for you, you no longer exist to me. I will not look at you, acknowledge your existence and if you are, in fact, on fire- I wouldn’t spit on you to put it out. Chances may be good that I lit the match.

But here is the difference- I can respect you and not care for you. I can see your value and your skills beyond whether or not we are friends. Respect is earned and it can be earned by someone I wouldn’t break bread with. If you at one point had not only my respect, but my friendship as well and you squandered it, belittled it, or flat out lied to me- you are less than dead to me.

What is less than dead you ask? Well, when someone leaves the earthly plain and you cared for them- you mourn their loss. You miss them. You still and will forever love them.

Less than dead means that the one who done me dirty doesn’t deserve what the dead do. They NEVER existed in my world. I obliterated their very existence. I do not see them. Will not hear them and may the gods help them if they approach me. They would be safer standing naked covered in raw meat in a lion’s den than approaching me.

You see, I don’t open myself to others easily. I am cautious. I have been hurt time and time again over the years so I guard my heart with knives of flaming death. When I test fate and open up to you and you take advantage or become a snake in the grass, you will suffer for your acts of treachery. The kindest thing I can offer is to show you that you do not matter to me or those in my orbit.

Be gone little speck of nothingness.

If I want to get nasty you would know it. But, in most cases, you don’t deserve the sweat, time, or effort needed to destroy you. You will do that all on your own. It’s called karma and she can be a bit of a bitch. Not as bad as me, but she’s learning.

Even though my little slice of this world has been invaded by snakes in the pristine grass I can still…

Find joy. Be joy. Enjoy.

**How do you handle people who have done you dirty?

Let’s talk. Tell me what you do in the comment section.