I’m afraid of very few things:
- Clowns- cuz why would you think this was cool? Did your school counselor tell you that it would be the perfect job for you? If so, you need to sue.
- Falling- I’m not afraid of heights. I am afraid of falling for an immense height…like 3 feet or more. But, I have learned to deal with this one.
- Sudden loud noises- duh.
- AND…spiders! Not the little shits that hang out in the corner of the ceiling. Nope. He’s cool. Not the little skittish spider that was hiding out in a dust covered box. Nope. He’s cool too.
- Now- if the spider is the size of a tennis ball- HIT IT WITH A CAR!
- If it can cause a part of my body to rot off if bitten- KILL HIM, HIS FAMILY, HIS LOVER’S FAMILY, AND THEN BURN THE FUCKING HOUSE DOWN AND MOVE TO ALASKA. The hubs won’t move to Alaska… 🙁
- I have killed two of these ^^^^^ (not the hubs) in my house the last few days. Two brown recluse spiders were chillin’ in my crib, like, “Bitch, get me a sammich.” NO.